Wednesday, December 24, 2003

Some chaps from a call centre company called Voiz Serv came to college and basically told us we didnt have a chance of being employed as engineers anyway so why not join a call centre instead? I suppose their argument was compelling but I didnt pay too much attention cos

1) It was freezing cold in the seminar hall with all the air conditioners going at full blast and

2) I really had to pee.

There's something about extreme cold which makes you want to pee, I dont know what. After half an hour I was an agony and hissed angrily each time the chap asked us a question.

Overenthusiastic marketing chap who cracks cliched jokes : " What skills do you have that set you apart ??"

Me : "I can pee...."

Overenthusiastic marketing chap who dosent know the difference between genuine laughter and mocking laughter: " You think knowing ohm's law will get you a job?"

Me: " I gotta pee..."

Overenthusiastic marketing chap who derives sadistic pleasure from not letting people pee : " Business Process outsourcing is the best thing that happened to India"

Me: "Whimper! squeak! I gotta peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!"

I think the brain is directly controlled by the bladder and not vice versa cos after a while I began hearing things:

Overenthusiastic marketing chap who also sells insurance for burst bladders: " Well, you guys have been excellent, its been a great pressure meeting you."

At this point, I couldnt take it, I just raised my hand and wiggled my little finger at the speaker. Without waiting for a reply, I ran out of the seminar hall. Was dismayed by the sight of the newly built fountain shooting water into the air. Shut my eyes and ran to the toilet block ( ground floor and first floor, only toilets). Never had I seen such a beautiful building. Ran straight into it did my thing and lived happily ever after.

Walked back home with Anju and noticed she had a wooden plaque with a prayer on it. Someone had given it to her for christmas. Took the plaque, read the prayer and then whacked her a few times with it. Nothing more pleasant than whacking Anju with " GOD'S PRAYER".

Went to the gym later and then headed for Odyssey. Place was jam packed with kids as there was some show for them. Pushed aside the Santa Claus and gave the security chap my bag. Paused a moment to survey the crowd and shook my head in disgust. The kids, their filthy rich parents, the teenagers with too much makeup, too much attitude and too many cellphones, the annoyingly cheerful Santa Claus who kept trying to shake my hand, they all irritated me. They were a snobbish bunch, all pretending to enjoy the spirit of christmas. Entered the shop and found it even more crowded. Checked out a few items, was appalled by their price and got back home.

Thursday, December 18, 2003

Yesterday, I unleashed a grin that split my face in half. I still havent stopped grinning...my friends know why.

Sunday, December 14, 2003

K, that was the most pathetic blog entry ever. I'm sick of a wishy washy, watery existence. Ladies and gentlemen, make way for the Hairy Chested, mentally tough brute!
I'm depressed. I feel rather unintelligent. Each entrance exam seems to prove that I dont have the stuff to make it big....I dont know what I lack, the brains or the drive. Perhaps I really am intelligent but just lack the desire, perhaps i'm not intelligent at all, I dislike being so ordinary, I dislike having my intelligence measured by such exams, I dislike being intellectually average....I'm sick of exams.

Saturday, December 13, 2003

Read " The English Teacher" by R.K Narayan, fell in love with the hero's wife and mourned with the hero when the wife died. Spent the afternoon in a coma and woke up after 4 hours, feeling at complete peace with myself and the world. Also went shopping with my parents, visited the temple and got back home.

Friday, December 12, 2003

I just finished " The Covenant " by James Michener and I've decided to get back to R.K Narayan. Dont get me wrong, I think James Michener writes wonderfully well, but this book was heavy with Christianity. He's also gone through great trouble to describe how the African Tribesmen killed each other. I've had just about enough of men impaled on spikes or their genitals ripped off.... its sickened me and I dont think I'll pick up another Michener for a while.

R.K Narayan I like and I got 3 of his books from the library today, just finished reading " The Bachelor of Arts " and just started " The English Teacher ". R.K Narayan seems to be the only author I really identify with. Simple, to the point and at every moment I'm able to relate each one of his characters to someone I know. My thoughts and ideas seem to mimic his perfectly, I really wish I could write just like him.

Well, have another hour before I head for class, I guess I shall pick up " The English Teacher" again.

Thursday, December 11, 2003

Downloaded some Coldplay off kazaa and love the lyrics:

Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are

I had to find you
Tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart

Tell me your secrets
And ask me your questions
Oh let's go back to the start

Running in circles
Coming in tales
Heads are a science apart

Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard

Oh take me back to the start

I was just guessing
At numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart

Questions of science
Science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart

Tell me you love me
Come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start

Running in circles
Chasing our tails
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy
Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard

I'm going back to the start



My parents have left for Madurai to attend a wedding and my cousin is making dinner. So far he has succeeded in making dosas of questionable shapes and sizes but I'm no complaining. Its not everyday that one gets a dosa shaped like an irregular polygon.

Also realised I tell everybody everything thats going on in my life, now thats a bad thing, so I shall put an end to that. Thus I shall not tell you that I was once chucked out of a shop for loitering, nor shall I tell you that I chased a friend with a mop in a shopping complex, so there!

Saturday, December 06, 2003

A fairly uneventful day. I made an appointment with Savant Technologies to make some enquiries for my project but the chap didnt turn up.
My SCMHRD exam is tommorow...not sure how it will be. Nothing much else actually, I spent my time either working out a few problems in quants or reading "The Covenant" by James Michener. I've taken quite a liking to his books, I think I'll pursue his writing for a while. I've had a lil too much of R.K Narayan for now and James Michener is a pleasant change.

Friday, December 05, 2003

There's nothing nicer on a chilly night to sit by yourself in your room with a nice book and your mother making a regular appearance to fill your plate with hot dosa and sambhar. Now that I've finished reading " Rosy is my relative ", I want to turn back time and start again.

I also visited Richie street for the first time and I found it absolutely bewildering. I've always known it to be a place where one could get electronic goods easily but I had no idea that one could buy computer hard disks from a vendor whose shop consisted of one newspaper laid out on the dusty road on top of which a dozen computer peripherals would be piled. The place is absolutely amazing. Hundreds upon hundreds of shops crowding the street, dealing with nothing but electronics, all incredibly small and all incredibly jam packed. In every shop I saw a man pondering over a circuit as he simultaneously soldered components onto a printed circuit board.

My friends and I were out there in order to purchase components for our project and we saw an advertisement for this place called Ajit Electronics. I found the place, opened the door and found myself not more than 1 foot away from a scowling sardar who sat on a dilapidated chair surrounded on 3 sides by mountains of electronic components, the fourth side being reserved for the customer. The place is so tiny that only 1 person can enter at a time. He shook his head irritably when I asked him if he sold current and potential transformers so I turned around with some difficulty and left the shop.

We werent able to obtain the components we needed so we were pretty fed up at the end of it. Got back home and crashed on the bed. Slept for a couple of hours, got up and read the book. Perhaps I should study now.

Thursday, December 04, 2003

College reopened but we were left free today so a few of us spent the afternoon in the english department helping Lima maam correct the english model exam papers. I came across some truly remarkable answers like:

Question: What will the world be like in the year 2070?
Ans : Computers will do all the work and man will become fat and lazy. Hence transportation will become difficult.

Question: What are the precautions to be taken in a Nuclear Power Plant?
Ans : Do not perform nuclear reactions close to the eye...

Otherwise did not accomplish much in college, came back home and ran to class where I had a mock XAT. The quants section was totally vague....couldnt make too much sense of it.

Came back home and feel dead tired. Will probably drop down any seco.....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

I have a terrible cold and my head feels like its been filled with lead :-(. I'm irritable, grumpy and tired but I just cant sleep. I was up till 1 last night playing a game of scrabble online, after which I spent the next 2 hours watching a tamil film dubbed in telugu and a telugu film dubbed in tamil.

Got up with a splitting headache and did nothing but mope around the whole day. Tried dozing in the afternoon but there were just far too many phone calls.

Went to a wedding in the evening, recognized absolutely nobody, ate dinner and got back home.

Monday, December 01, 2003

I am only moderately aware of the events happening in the world...not a very good thing considering many entrance exams have a general knowledge section. I really should read the papers and watch the news more often.

My grandfather treasured the newspaper. It had to be read in the morning while sipping hot coffee. After reading the paper, he would spend another 5 minutes carefully folding and creasing it. The paper often looked much better after he'd read it.

As a child, adolescent and rather immature adult, I have always avoided the newspaper, deeming it to be one of those boring things adults read out of force of habit. My own interest in the papers has been limited to reading the sports section and in that, only the cricket section. I care not for politics be it central or regional. We seem to be having elections all the time! I dont see the point in knowing who the external affairs minister is or who the health minister is..whats the point if they keep changing them anyway? Perhaps I have the view of an ignoramus but I am a content ignoramus.

Unfortunately, the chaps who set the papers for entrance exams dont seem to share my view. Infact, they have a seperate section called " General knowledge " which gives me the willies. I dont know where to start reading from :-(. Oh well, I could atleast try to read todays paper...

Saturday, November 29, 2003

Got placed at a company called ZITT TECHNOLOGIES today but I dont think I'll accept. There wouldnt be any point in writing all these MBA entrance exams then.

The group discussion was pretty good fun though. The topic given was " India's performance in Australia" so everyone had lots to say. After the GD , we were each given a topic to speak on immediately, a sort of extempore. My topic was " the moon" and I blabbed something about the effect of the moon on the tides. Deepak's topic was " Banyan tree" and he uttered these immortal words: " Banyan tree is a tree. It is a very good tree. It gives bannanas." He comes out later and complains "Macchan, I had no idea what to say, I'm not a bio student."

Got back home, dozed off, woke up and went to the gym. An immensely muscular chap has joined our gym and helped me with my triceps workout. He kept pushing me and completely fried my tris. I cant even move the mouse now. Arms will probably be pretty sore tommorow. I do wish to look like him though :P.

My next entrance exam is on the 7th and I havent done anything as yet. It sickens me just to look at the huge pile of material on my table. I do have to get started though...maybe tommorow...

Thursday, November 27, 2003

Friends came over in order to start work on the project today and one of them dutifully brought along a porn CD entitled " Double Penentration". He was rather chagrined when the cd didnt work and dissapeared somewhere claiming he knew what to do. Was rather surprised to find him in the loo washing the cd with soap and water. I knew I had to be firm with the boy so I told him under no circumstances would I allow him to watch it in my house. Dont get me wrong, I look upon porn as a sort of art form but I also know for a fact that anything with so suspicious a title involves transexuals...a not so pretty sight.

Endured their presence from 9 AM to 6 PM and didnt do anything productive. My next exam is only a week away but I dont seem to be able to get myself to study.Oh well, there's always tommorow.

Sunday, November 23, 2003

Well, the CAT's been cancelled. Yesterday I wasnt sure how I felt about it, I was just too confused. This morning however, I've been able to see the bright side of it. I dont think I did the verbal section too well as I spent too much time in the quants and logical. So now I get another chance.

House was flooded with phone calls once we got the news. I spent most of the afternoon with a phone to each ear.

A few of us from class were supposed to meet last evening to 'celebrate' after the CAT. Then when the exam got cancelled, we didnt have a legitimate reason to celebrate but we met anyway. Had Pizza, corn on the cob and then went about on the merry-go-round. Someone please tell me how old I am.

Got back home and another session of frenzied phone calls. Tried going to sleep but my mind just wouldnt shut up. Too many thoughts going around. Spent the night tossing and turning. Got up rather grumpy.

I have to go to college for some reason now.

Thursday, November 20, 2003

The MICA application form has some rather annoying questions to be answered. The devilish bastards seem to enjoy asking very uncomfortable questions. Let me give you a sample: " State briefly how people who know you would describe you. What would they say about your interests, achievements, special traits, strengths and weaknesses? ". After which I have a grand total of 4 lines to scrawl my answer.

How do I answer the question without sounding like a pompous ass? Also notice how they say " what would THEY say about your achievements? " Now how do I answer that?People who do read this blog, I need some help.

I decided to call up a few people and demand compliments so that I could write them down. Called up Aparna and she very sweetly loaded me with compliments. In 5 minutes I began to feel very good about myself. GOD! I WAS SOMEONE SPECIAL!! The euphoria lasted for the entire conversation. Now that I've put the phone down, I cant think of a single word to write. Still, I am rather glad I called her up.

Well, the CAT''s on sunday but who cares? After its just another exam right? So what if I've been preparing for this day for an entire year? So what if I've spent fabulous amounts on all the application forms? So what if................I'm so scared :-(

Wednesday, November 19, 2003

Turns out women know a lot more about mens shaving cream than men do. A classmate of mine clearly identified the shaving cream I used just by the smell which seemed to hover about me (Perhaps I should say fragrance). I came back home, checked the label and she was completely right. Rather surprised because even I dont know what I'm slathering on my face, be it shaving cream or rancid yak butter.

Well, 2 days to the CAT.....it dosent seem to have sunk in yet....what am I doing with my life?

Tuesday, November 18, 2003

Ugh, I cant believe we lost to Australia again...to think Ian Harvey polished us off.....well, that just hurts.

I dont seem to have much to say except :
"CAT!!!OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD"

Saturday, November 15, 2003

There's a rather distressing tendency among women today to completely exclude the male from their conversation.You could be walking between two good friends when suddenly one will pull the other close to her and whisper national secrets into her ear. The male is temporarily forgotten and all he can do is fidget and pray that they'll snap put of it soon.

As an average male, I have become quite used to being totally ignored by the female species. I am not an alpha male, I do not exude pheromones that drive women wild, in fact most women look upon me as their retarded half brother. Tis not an enviable position that I enjoy, however I have learnt to live with it.

Lets take for example today, I was out with a couple of girls I know in order to purchase a gift and I was periodically cast aside whenever one girl decided to share some esoteric information with the other. Just what is it that demands so much secrecy, so much privacy? Why is the male considered unworthy of such precious information? I strained my ears to listen but there was nothing I could decipher. Perhaps their conversation went like this:

Girl 1 grabs Girl 2 and hisses the following into her ear:

Girl 1: "Guess what?? They've discovered an eco-friendly method to ward off black-headed caterpillar in coconuts!!!"

Girl 2 " Gosh! You dont say!!! "

However, it is very unlikely the above conversation took place. The following dialogue is probably more likely:

Girl 1 : " Ugh, just what induced us to invite this guy? Thats the 4th time he's tripped on the staircase "

Girl 2 : " I couldnt agree more! and what awful taste in clothing! I dont want to be seen standing next to him! "


I've been ignored so many times now, I actually have a few years experience beneath my belt. Thats one reason why I dont get so perturbed.

Other than that, had some tasty masala poli to eat with them outside. Came back home and found my mom had made cutlets for dinner. Thats two rounds of mouth watering cholestrol, so overall, not a bad day.

Thursday, November 13, 2003

Exams finally over, God be praised. My brain feels pooped. Nothing can go in, nothing can come out. I think I'm in some sort of coma.

Well, have to rouse myself now and study for the CAT. Cant believe its only a week away, seems like only yesterday I attended my first coaching class...time does fly these days.

Tuesday, November 11, 2003

I shouldnt be writing this, really I shouldnt. I should be sitting under a tree somewhere, preaching the advantages and disadvantages of a brushless DC motor. There should be tears in my eyes as I describe the wonders of a variable reluctance stepper motor. I should shriek with joy as I tell you the magnificence that is the switched reluctance motor..........oh crap! I dont even know what those terms mean! My exam is on thursday and yet I seem to be unable to approach my books. My mind refuses to accept formuale, equations and vector diagrams. I shall probably be numb with fear tommorow....so much to do, so little time...why is the last minute so insufficient? There should be some kind of rule " students are permitted to study till the last minute, the time duration of the last minute also being decided by the students. Until then, no exams are to be held".........I'm desperate arent I?

Sunday, November 09, 2003

Its raining right now and I'm in a good mood. I dont know why though. I'm filled with hope and joy. So what if I have an exam on thursday whose contents I'm yet to determine? So what if the CAT is less than two weeks away and I cant add 2 numbers without a calculator?. These things seem of no concern at all to me. I'm positive, I'm ecstatic, euphoric, rapturous, elated, overjoyed, blissful, enthusiastic, inspired, rapt....I'm just feeling good about myself.

And on that positive note, I shall bid you goodnight.

Saturday, November 08, 2003

Paper on Microcontrollers today and another lengthy exercise of creative writing. I'm quite sick of writing exams now, unfortunately I have one more to go. This will be followed by a slew of entrance exams.....not sure how long I can cope.

The telephone we normally use to make calls is dead, hence there's someone permanantly in my room using the phone I use for the internet. I had no idea I needed the phone so much, I get highly impatient when I see someone using it.

My sis seems to be better, she removed the bandages from her eyes a day before she was supposed to. I think she couldnt bear the thought of not watching TV.

Another mock CAT tommorow, lets see how I do.

Thursday, November 06, 2003

My sister has caused some temporary damage to her eyes and is lying in bed with both eyes bandaged. Apparently she'd been wearing the disposable contacts long after she should have disposed them. To make things worse, she opened a bottle of ether in the chem lab and the fumes affected her eyes badly. I only hope she gets better soon, cant bear the thought of her suffering.

Didnt do much today, sort of completed the SPJMR form, still havent answered the question on family values. Not quite sure what he expects.

Also went to class at around 6:15 and found Aparna there. She'd been there since 5:30 :-(. I think we misunderstood each other on the phone. Felt really sorry for the poor thing.

Feeling rather drowsy now, will hit the hay.

Wednesday, November 05, 2003

Woke up rather early and hit the books. Spent about 3 hours staring at them before becoming thoroughly bored. I then decided I had to do something about the CAT, so I sat down and made a plan. Then spread all the material I would need on the bed and felt really good about myself. There was so much to read! I pictured myself getting up early every morning and working out problems till it was time for bed. God I would be so studious! I would avoid thinking about that rather nice girl, grow a beard and mustache, forget the cricket matches, forget movies, forget story books and devote myself entirely to the
CAT.........

The trouble with such fantasies is that they remain fantasies. While the thought of me slogging it out appeals to me immensely, actually slogging it out does not....I think I need some help.

Once again avoided filling out the SPJMR form...well, I'll do it tommorow no matter what...

Was paid a visit by my neighbours daugher. She's about 7 and speaks wonderfully fluent tamil. She thought of me as a rather enthusiastic listener and filled me in on how her day was. Also described her teacher as a "Boochandi" and told me I looked just like him. This was followed by peals of laughter. She enjoyed the joke immensely and then asked for a biscuit. I reluctantly handed her the last one from the pack I'd just purchased. This ornament of her sex daintily licked the cream, dropped the biscuit on the floor and once again burst into laughter. I went back to the kitchen to open a new pack but she
disappeared by the time I got back. Perhaps I wasnt so interesting after all.

Also spent the day sniffing Pril dish washing fluid. It smells so lemony, I think I'm addicted. Also rather suprised at the label on Mortein mosquito repellent:
" Mortein: Pleasant lemony fragrance, DO NOT INHALE! "

Had sweet corn at pushpa shoppe along with a few classmates and now paying the price for it. I have about a dozen strands stuck inbetween my teeth. My tounge appears to be bruised.

Will probably doze of now...perhaps I should study....GOD I NEED SOME MOTIVATION!

Tuesday, November 04, 2003

Wrote a new article today and havent recieved any favorable reviews as yet :-). Slightly worried if I'm losing my sense of humour...havent been able to be funny off late. I seem to prefer a long winding narrative these days.

Spent the morning finishing the article, slept through the afternoon and left for class at around 4:30. Tried filling out the SPJMR application form but it called for way too much introspection. I felt slightly inferior at the end of the introspection. I'll have to come up with some fiction pretty soon.

Will probably look at the application again now.

Monday, November 03, 2003

Had to go to the British Council today and decided to take a bus after 11:30. That way I wouldnt be crushed in the bus by the office going crowd. Turns out there are a lot of people out there who think just like me. Spent most of the journey being crushed by the non office going crowd. The bus grew even more crowded at Saidapet, rekindling the hate I had for Saidapet as a child. Every single day on the bus to school, I would be mercilessly squashed by the massive hoards of people that got in there. I hated Saidapet with such intensity, I often considered bombing the place. The journey home from school always filled me with a great love for Saidapet as almost everybody got down there. After 45 minutes of non stop standing, I could heave a sigh of relief and actually get a place to sit.

Almost got a seat in the bus today but generously decided to give it to a middle aged man who made a desperate lunge for it. Was rather taken aback when the man gave me money and asked me to buy him a ticket. Gratitude is rather hard to find these days. I got a seat next to him a few stops later and had a small chat with him. His name was Hamid and he has 2 sons and daughter, all of whom have studied engineering. I find it difficult to listen due to the roar of the engine but I smile and nod a lot anyway. I've discovered I can get away with anything just by smiling and nodding. Word of caution: If I smile and nod while you talk, it means I'm thinking about Carmen Electra.

Got down near the British Council and discovered I'd forgotten to bring the membership card. I could only return the book I had, not take anything new. Also ran into Amrita and the 2 of us went to Spencer Plaza. Spent some time in an exotic coffee shop sipping crushed ice with strawberry flavour. I couldnt finish it, so I asked Amrita to do the honours. Also watched an instructive video on how coffee is prepared. Its put me of coffee forever. The way it was shown, coffee beans were poured down a sewer and ground in a rusty machine. The whole process looked exceedingly unhygenic.

Came outside to catch the bus home. Also caused Amrita to miss not 1 but 2 buses. In case your reading this Ami, I want you to know I felt a small tinge of guilt in the afternoon.

Picked up the application form for MICA , got back home, had a paltry lunch and set off for CAT class. Too tired to write anymore.

Sunday, November 02, 2003

Praveen's birthday today and solemnly watched him recieve his birthday bumps. The vast number of kicks that landed on his unfortunate bottom should not suffice not only for this life, but for the next couple of rebirths too.

I've never been a fan of birthday bumps, especially because I have been the unfortunate recipient of numerous well directed kicks. The perverse pleasure obtained from mutilating anothers backside is quite alien to me. I remember nursing a sore bottom for a week. (Word of caution: Never use an Indian style toilet for a few days after the birthday bumps. The anguish suffered while squating down is too painful to even write about).

Also watched my dad frantically search for his green diary. He spent 2 minutes looking for it and about 20 minutes loudly pointing out the ill effects of my mothers perennial desire to tidy the house. That my mom hadnt actually touched anything in his room was immaterial. His reasoning went like this: My mother loved to organize therefore the diary was missing. Why didnt she just let things be?. I finally found the diary in the file containg all my MBA applications. Mom and I watched dad slowly swallow his words.

I have to fill out the application form for SPJMR. It includes a number of painful questions like " If you had a choice, what aspect of yourself would you change?" and " What are your family values? ". Such questions call for certain amount of introspection and I've never been very good at that. I shall postpone writing it till the sheer pressure of the deadline forces me to look deep inside and come up with some suitable fiction.

Saturday, November 01, 2003

Had a paper on " Personal Computer systems" today and mistakenly wrote " Personal Computing systems " on the subject block. ( Errenous perhaps, but I think it sounds WAY more elegant :P ). Miss.K.Uma who was invigilating looked morosely at my paper and asked me to change it. Uma tends to retain her facial expression for much longer than required. She went about looking morose for almost half an hour. Evidently she cant get her facial muscles to relax.

The paper was cruelly long as have been the others till now. I couldnt flex my wrist and fingers at the end of the alloted 3 hours. My writing efforts however paled as usual in comparison to Bhagya, Shoba and Praveen who seem to have an insatiable appetite for paper. While I struggled to fill the main sheet with information relevant (mostly irrelevant) to the question, they seemed to be writing in some kind of mad frenzy, consuming vast quantities of paper. There's almost an air of desperation when they write. " So much to say, so little time" .

This has often struck me as unfair as we usually study together. Logically speaking, we should all be equipped with the same amount of knowledge. Perhaps they slip in Leo Tolstoy's "War and Peace" just to add to the poundage. They seem to get excellent marks anyway.

I for one, am totally against writing boundless answers. I like to think that short crisp answers should suffice. This logical deduction has never helped me obtain good marks in the university exams. The university only rewards those who have a perverted fascination for paper.