Friday, July 30, 2004

My dads sodium level came upto 124. Normally he should have become a lot more cogent. He was pretty dull though. He's also had a fever off and on (this was the original complaint when we first went to see the doctor). So some cerebro spinal fluid was taken for testing. The test results say its Tubercular Meningitis. All the antibiotics he's taken have prevented it from worsening and from tommorow he will be started on antibiotics for treating it specifically.

So now we have to wait for the TM to settle and also wait for the kidney to heal. Its pretty complicated. A bad combination of High BP, Diabetes and Infection. My father always has had high BP but he refused to go to a doctor for over 30 years, simply because they scared him. The diabetes is probably a side effect of  high BP and the infection is due to weakening of the immune system, once again due to high BP and diabetes.

All this could have been avoided if he'd just had his pressure under control, thats whats so frustrating.

I know he'll get better and that we just have to wait it out. Its really hard on the family. My mom is made of pretty strong stuff and she can cope. Its my sister who gets really upset and starts crying. Me? I'm sort of emotionally detached. I know its just a matter of time. I know the end result is going to be good and I'm prepared to wait. My schedule has gone haywire though. I havent attended my NIIT class in 2 weeks. I dont about the outcome of the Polaris interview, some of my friends have started getting calls. I might also join a course to prepare for CAT 2004. Too many things competing for my attention now.

Thursday, July 29, 2004

Sodium - I think I've said that word more than a thousand times this week.

Here's what happened. I came back home from my Polaris interview on the 20'th. At around 7:30 PM when my dad was eating his dinner, he started behaving in an extremely odd fashion. He seemed to have no control over his spoon and he was spilling his food all over himself without even being aware of it. His responses to our questions were slow and sluggish. We decided to take him to the hospital immediately. Everything was delayed a bit because my dad refused to come to the hospital. We cried, pleaded, threatened and cajoled but he just sat in his chair and refused.Finally we had no choice, we carried him with the chair into the car.

He spent 2 days in the normal ward and was then transferred to the ICU because his sodium levels had fallen to 116. Its around 135 for a normal person. The ordinary saline given wasnt being absorbed by his body so a special 3% hypertonic saline solution had to be given via the jugular vein. The insertion of the drip in the jugular vein has to be done very very carefully. So my dad spent 4 days in the ICU until his sodium level came upto 127. On monday, he as shifted to a room opposite the ICU.

His sodium level dropped again to 120, but the doctor said he didnt want to give drips anymore and said we had to bring it up only with a special diet. So far his sodium levels have gone up by 1 point a day. The real complication is that his kidney has been affected by his high BP and diabetes, hence it is not able to absorb the sodium.Instead it is sending it out through the urine. Now due to low sodim levels he's pretty groggy. His facial muscles on one side have become weak and he slurs whenever he talks.

Handling my father has been really tough in these 8 days. When he was in the general ward, he'd keep pulling the IV out of his arm. One morning when my mother and I fell asleep from sheer exhaustion, he got off the bed on his own, took two steps and fell right on top of me. I woke up just to see my dad falling and caught him, badly spraining my left shoulder in the process.

After he spent 2 days in the ICU, he pulled the IV right out of the jugular vein, something really really dangerous. They had to tie him up to prevent him from injuring himself further, something which really insulted my father.

He's like a big baby now. Every move of his needs watching. He's developed a fever and whenever he feels hot he pulls all his clothes off. Everyday we wonder what his sodium level is. We've also learnt the hard way that we cannot expect him to improve from one day to the next. One day he's quite sharp mentally and the next day its difficult to wake him. For the last week we've had our hopes repeatedly raised and dashed to the ground. We just have to be patient and wait for the kidney to heal itself.

When he talks, its so crazy at times, we dont know whether to laugh or to cry. As he kept trying to take his clothes off when he felt hot, my sister held his hand and said " How can you be naked when I'm the room. You think its right for me to see you this way? ". To which he said " Of course, you are my daughter after all".

My sister seems to be at the recieving end for all his answers. A couple of days back we made him sit in the chair and talk to us. We asked him to give our birth dates. He got everybody's right but my sister's wrong. When asked if we should buy my sister some nice jewellery, he said " Let her get pregnant and then we'll get her jewellery". Needless to say, my sister wasnt the least bit pleased.

His higher faculties do seem to be in good shape though. He remembers everything about the university and his job. He remembers what he last taught my cousin last in physics. Its just his day to day behaviour that is upsetting.

In a way its a good thing I dont have a job now because I'm there to look after him. We dont know how long it will take and by the looks of it, its going to be a looong time. Guess I just have to be patient.

Tuesday, July 20, 2004

My interview...well I wont say I stared blankly at the interviewer, nor will I say I
knew the answer to everything. Trouble was that it was a purely technical
interview, no frills at all, nothing I could answer breezily and show him how
confident I was. No questions like " Tell me about yourself, family, goals..blah
blah" or " Why should we hire you? ". No sir, all questions dealt with C and C++.
Not even the fundemental concepts but more fuzzy ones like pointers and linked
lists. I could answer his questions for each concept initially but as he went deeper
into the topic, I found myself floundering until he went on to the next topic. If I
didnt know it, I said so .

My friends who attended the interview last week said the whole thing had been
quite an informal affair, not very techie. Mine was totally the opposite.

Then the interviewer carefully scanned my marksheet and said " You seem to be
answering well but how you come you dont have such great marks in C? ". Tough one to answer eh? So I said I didnt believe that my marks really reflected
my abilities. He nodded his head and said " Maybe so, but you cant use it as an
excuse." I grinned and said I totally agreed with him but insisted I was telling the
truth when it came to that particular paper. I didnt know what else to say.

So I'm not really sure how I've done. I knew something but nothing hardcore. I
was a lil dissapointed however my friends cheered me up saying that I was after
all an electrical engineering student and that Polaris wouldnt expect me to know C
and C++ inside out. I dont know if I can take comfort in that...

Its not in my hands anymore, if I get it, then well and good. If not, there's always
the CAT.
Well, I'm off to my interview...I'm not as nervous as I usually am...but I am still a teeny weeny bit nervous :P. I just hope it goes well.

I usually settle down well at the actual interview...its just until the interview that I'm all jittery. My mind comes up wth a dozen questions I dont have the answer to and then I panic for a while.
Anyway, come what may, even if I dont know a thing, I'm going to be positive and confident. I think that should help. Wish me luck.

Friday, July 16, 2004

There's some  good news and there's some bad news.
The good news is that I've been shortlisted for the second round of interview by Polaris. My interview is on Tuesday at 11:00 AM. Its supposed to be technical. Wish me luck. These guys do move slow... I attended the first interview sometime in May.
The bad news...well we just found out that my dad has both high blood pressure as well as diabates. We've been in and out of hospitals and clinics for the past week, taking blood samples, urine samples, having tests done and having tests confirmed....well now we know whats bothering him.
My mom has taken some severe measures when it comes to food. No oil, no ghee, no sugar, microscopic amounts of salt...well its been very hard on my dad. He sulks at the dinner table and hardly eats anything.
Hmmm, I also learned to make rice...I make some pretty decent rice I think...I'm learning more everyday...

Thursday, July 08, 2004

I've quit fretting about my job status. It will come when it has to come. Might as well do things that are within my control like preparing for the CAT. I have a feeling I'll clear the aptitude test for CTS. The interview is supposed to be tough, so I've started brushing up my engineering.

Among other things, My cousin Prashant works at the Taj Coromandel. Poor chap leaves the house at 6:00 AM and returns at 10:00 PM. Anyway, he usually has an interesting story to tell every night. Right now the Indian cricket team is staying at the Taj, so Prashant gets to see them pretty often. (He's cleaned Dravid's room and folded Yuvraj's underwear..."Theyre all Reebok" he tells me.)

Anyway, Zaheer Khan comes to the front desk. The place is filled with kids and their parents who are screaming for his autograph. Zaheer Khan has forgotten his room number, so he asks the receptionist for it. The receptionist gets real nervous and goes into some kind of trance.

Zaheer Khan : " I've forgotten my room number, can you tell me what it is? "

Receptionist (dazedly): " One moment sir. What is your name sir? "

Sepulchral silence.

Zaheer Khan (looking her up and down): "Uhm, Zaheer Khan..."

Nothing else for now. I've started studying with my friend Archie for the CAT. Helps to have a partner esp when all you want to do is sleep in the afternoon. This way I'm more productive when I'm least productive and I dont feel guilty about wasting my time at the end of the day.

Monday, July 05, 2004

K,you know what? I'm getting sick of the Penis Enlargement ads that cram my inbox. Everyday I have to patiently clean out a dozen emails that claim that if I buy their
product, I will be able to satisfy a blue whale. Pills, powders, rubber thingies, secret Arabian techniques.....apparently there's this technique called the "Arabian Jelq"
or something which is taught by Arabian fathers to their Arabian sons so that they may use their thingies more effectively to produce more Arabian sons and thus pass
on the ancient jelq tradition. Now why do I want to know all this? After all, size does not matter when

a)you never have got any
b)you arent getting any
c)you are not likely to get any for a while...

Some of these emails have very detailed diagrams too....not something you want to see when

1) you are straight
2) you are frantically going through your email in search of a letter from a prospective employer.

Ofcourse there is the case of one of these penis enlargement companies is looking for a fresh BE graduate in the field of electrical engineering for a challenging and
exciting career in penis enlargement all for a "huge" salary...Now that I might consider....

Sunday, July 04, 2004

What can I say? I miss her so bad.

Saturday, July 03, 2004

Got this off an email forward:

Question: What is the height of globalization?

Answer: Princess Diana's death
Question: How come?

Answer: An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French
tunnel, driving a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who
was high on Scottish whiskey, followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on
Japanese motorcycles, treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian
medicines! And this is sent to you by an Indian, using Bill Gates'
technology which he stole from the Japanese. And you are probably reading
this on one of the IBM clones that use Philippine-made chips, and Korean
made monitors, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant,
transported by lorries driven by Malaysians, hijacked by Indonesians and
finally sold to you by a Chinese!

That's Globalization

Thursday, July 01, 2004

Whew! So I'm finally an engineer :-). Results came out today, I got 83% :-D.
Highest I ever scored in my engineering (come to think of it, all my life:P). Now all I need is a job :P