Saturday, January 10, 2004

Grandmothers are people too. I have just realised that. I have somehow spent 20 years of my life believing that the only thing that grandmothers did was to ask their grandchildren to eat curd rice. It has also occured to me that my grandmother was once young. Rather hard to digest huh? I always assumed that my grandmother was born as a grandmother, she had no past and would go on being a grandmother for all eternity. Similarly I dont see myself as a father with a wife and kids, supporting his parents. I would never age. I would go on studying, my father would go on being a physics professor, my mom would go on being a teacher and my grandmother would go on being a grandmother. When I sit at the dinner table with the entire family, it never occurs to me that one day I'll be the father looking across at his son or daughter, that my father and mother would be grandparents interested in curd rice and my grandmother might be no more. Thats one reason I dislike death. It jolts me out of my reverie and forces me to wonder if one day I'll be motionless and stiff with people crying all around me. Nah, I wont ever die. Its impossible. I will always be live and animated.

I have always believed in the infiniteness of things. When I was in school, I never stopped to think there was a world beyond 12'th standard. I was confident that I could spend eternity in school. Even after I finished my 12th, I refused to believe in anything other than school. Now that I finally realise I'm no longer in school, I'm practically out of college. Now I have to think hard about my future. Where did all the time go?

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